Dearest Rachel – So the plastic sheeting came down the other day, so it doesn’t look so much like Daniel and I are living in some elaborate tent anymore. It’s actually mildly disconcerting how accustomed I got with the ‘hall’ that had been created in the sunroom between the entrance and the master bedroom area.Continue reading “Elegance Beneath”
Author Archives: randy@letters-to-rachel.memorial
Facing Myself in the Morning
Dearest Rachel – Back in the day, when I was still a part of the work farce, Mohinder would ask me about what I told myself each morning when I would stare at myself in the bathroom mirror, getting ready for the new day. He didn’t seem to think I could face my reflection andContinue reading “Facing Myself in the Morning”
490 Grains of Dust
Dearest Rachel – For all of Pastor Scott’s assertions that he’s never met any alleged skeptic who, when confronted with the challenge to ‘name one’ of the supposed many contradictions in the Bible, hasn’t backed down, there are a number of issues one can deal with when going through scripture. One of these is puttingContinue reading “490 Grains of Dust”
Press ‘2’ For Snow
Dearest Rachel – I just sent the letter out to you yesterday, but I wonder if I shouldn’t make ‘Retail Therapy’ a whole new category of story for me to tell you about. There have certainly been enough purchases that I could retroactively add the category to, and I’m sure that I will make moreContinue reading “Press ‘2’ For Snow”
Retail Therapy
Dearest Rachel – I’m pretty sure it’s not a phrase of your own provenance, although I’m fairly certain I heard it from your lips a number of times. I think you used it to describe several of your friends and their behavior, and while neither of us engaged in it (much), it wasn’t exactly anContinue reading “Retail Therapy”
Schoolhouse Rock
Dearest Rachel – Ever since I made this a challenge to myself, to write you something at least once a day, there are days when I find myself wondering what’s going to be new that’s going to be worth telling you about. It is a ‘new normal’ that I am living in, but when youContinue reading “Schoolhouse Rock”
The Farce is Strong with This One
Dearest Rachel – Saturday, July 9 (3pm) I have so many potential titles for this letter, but it may have to wait to see how things play out, which means that this will need to carry over through tomorrow, because it’s not going to be able to be wrapped up today. However, today is notContinue reading “The Farce is Strong with This One”
from Rachel: My Thought Closet
Write down the “I am” statements you say when you’re beating yourself up. I am “so lazy.” I am “such a procrastinator.” I am “so silly/foolish/stupid/idiotic/weird.” What words best describe how you feel when you beat yourself up? “defeated, incapable, incompetent” How in control are you over your thoughts? “infrequently” Are you satisfied with yourContinue reading “from Rachel: My Thought Closet”
Oh, The Places You’d Gone!
Dearest Rachel – Earlier last week, I swapped out the quilt I’d been using on our bed for the last few months, since the rest of them arrived just in time for Daniel’s birthday (which was particularly fortuitous, since his quilt was among those returned by the company assembling them) – not to mention theContinue reading “Oh, The Places You’d Gone!”
Personal Public Events
Dearest Rachel – Went to bed last night thinking about weddings, honey. The group had been brainstorming ideas over text messages about what to do this evening, or more specifically, what to eat, since I’d been talking about breaking in the new appliances (and despite MatPat’s insistence that it can be done, I have noContinue reading “Personal Public Events”
Lowering the Boom
Dearest Rachel – Another day, another tranche of falsehoods to deal with and dismiss. I’ve already given up on the online dating scene, but I keep having to deal with the occasional zombie that crops up and refuses to go down. Fortunately, like with the walking dead themselves, they seem to be somewhat short onContinue reading “Lowering the Boom”
Little Nightmares
Dearest Rachel – So, last night’s study had us wrapping up the book of Philippians; you know the passage, the one about not being anxious, but rejoicing in every situation. I’ve always had difficulty with that, simply because I can’t keep from thinking of joy as an emotion, as opposed to an action (yes, IContinue reading “Little Nightmares”
Zeno’s Pillbox
Dearest Rachel – At this rate, I wonder if I’m ever going to finish these pills. Or, for that matter, how I’m expecting to cut them any further. First, the good news. Remember that issue I had with my thumb a week and a half ago? As you’ll recall, they prescribed a couple of pillsContinue reading “Zeno’s Pillbox”
Musgo
Dearest Rachel – It’s one of the stranger reasons I have to contact you this evening; most meals fly under the radar, unless it’s one I put together (and while the kitchen is all but finished, I’ve not yet gotten to the point where I feel comfortable actually cooking in here, particularly when the pots,Continue reading “Musgo”
Fallout From the Fourth
He who goes forthwith a fifth on the Fourthmay not go forth on the fifth Anti-drunk-driving PSA, as quoted in Reader’s Digest Dearest Rachel – No, this is not meant to be taken literally, as I’m sure you would have guessed by now (not that I have any clue how you keep track of timeContinue reading “Fallout From the Fourth”
A Place for Patriotism
Dearest Rachel – I remember the second time we went to Israel as part of the church group. We were in Jerusalem by the Wailing Wall as the sun set on Friday. Various groups – not tourists, but local Israelis, some religious groups, others quite clearly military units, as could be told from their variousContinue reading “A Place for Patriotism”
from Rachel: Not So Well With My Soul
What do Genesis 1:3, 6, 9, 11, 14, 20, 24 reveal about how God uses words? “He uses words to make thoughts into reality/substance.” Proverbs 18:21 describe two distinct outcomes of our words. What are they? “Life and death.” What are some words that breathe life into you? “Special, blessing, friend, best, love, precious, cherish”Continue reading “from Rachel: Not So Well With My Soul”
The Curtain Can’t Come Down Soon Enough
Dearest Rachel – In a different context, you’d be forgiven for thinking that I’m about to break my promise to myself and you about keeping politics to a minimum with a title like that – it’s the sort of sentiment anyone with our belief system (or even dealing with the struggling economy) has to beContinue reading “The Curtain Can’t Come Down Soon Enough”
Approaching the End Game
Dearest Rachel – You might remember my talking about the delivery of all the appliances from Abt back… how many months ago? Heck, I think about it been late last year, in fact. Well, over the course of the past week, the construction team has been clearing all of this out of the garage, asContinue reading “Approaching the End Game”
Abandoned
Dearest Rachel – Last night’s dream was a weird one to wake up from. What I can remember of it had to do with the family and a handful of others (including animals) needing to get back from somewhere in central Missouri, and quickly. So, while most of the others got cars to drive homeContinue reading “Abandoned”
Walking Out the Door
Dearest Rachel – It really feels weird to simply walk out the open door and keep going, but that’s how things are this morning. The tiling team is in today to work on the backsplash, so they need to keep going outside, where they’ve got their table saw out to cut each piece to fit.Continue reading “Walking Out the Door”
Too Much Like an Angel
Dearest Rachel – Late last week, I received a rather large envelope in the mail from a location that didn’t register with me. To be sure, most mail that arrives comes from such locations; even the bills that I process regularly come from addresses that I forget from month to month – the only reasonContinue reading “Too Much Like an Angel”
Primary Concerns
Just remember when you step into your voting boothHe’ll never lie, he’ll just ‘embellish the truth’ Steve Taylor, “Whatever Happened to Sin?” from I Want to Be a Clone (1982) Dearest Rachel – It’s that time again. No, it’s time to spin the Wheel of Amorality, otherwise known as ‘our civic duty,’ or, more toContinue reading “Primary Concerns”
Let’s Try This Again…
Dearest Rachel – I’m fully aware of the fact that most of the things that are happening to me these days that I keep informing you of are fairly little things, when looked at dispassionately. A swollen thumb is as nothing compared to the loss of a limb, say, or (more to the point) theContinue reading “Let’s Try This Again…”
Bad Charlotte or, When Do I Get My Superpowers?
Dearest Rachel – I’m not entirely sure when it started; I’m thinking it was early this past week, either Monday or Tuesday. It might have been earlier, too – I just don’t remember. Whenever it was, I assumed it was just a mosquito bite on my thumb, right alongside of my knuckle. Nothing particularly unusualContinue reading “Bad Charlotte or, When Do I Get My Superpowers?”
from Rachel: My Broken Dreams
How about you? Ever sing along, hoping the song (‘When You Wish Upon a Star’) might be true? “I’ve sung the song, but I’m not sure I had any particular dreams in mind. If I did, they were probably outside of the natural order of possibilities. My favorite fantasies involve portals to other worlds: policeContinue reading “from Rachel: My Broken Dreams”
A Weekend in a Day
Dearest Rachel – It’s weird to realize how little of what I’d had lined up for this weekend would have happened were you still with me. It’s even stranger to realize how few of the plans that I thought I had actually managed to pan out. And yet, there was plenty else to rush inContinue reading “A Weekend in a Day”
Resentful of Mercy
Dearest Rachel – I can’t necessarily speak for you, but I have always felt quite safe in our home. Despite its location on a major thoroughfare – or maybe because of it, as its high visibility and lack of street parking precluded most easy break-in possibilities – and its location literally on the ‘wrong sideContinue reading “Resentful of Mercy”
It Seems I Have My Answer
Dearest Rachel – It wasn’t until late in the day yesterday that I realized what day it was. The 23rd of June had all but come and gone, and while I’d remembered you and sent a letter going on about the misadventures of the day, I’d forgotten what the date was, and what it signified.Continue reading “It Seems I Have My Answer”
Between Comedy and Tragedy
Dearest Rachel – It’s been years since I’ve been here at Walker Brothers’ pancake house. I’m pretty sure that the last time we were here (and yes, it was definitely ‘we’ at the time), it was for a similar reason; we had taken my car in to have it looked at. That’s what happens whenContinue reading “Between Comedy and Tragedy”
Palm Tuesday
Dearest Rachel – So, I stayed home yesterday in order to be with Daniel, and to make his day special. Far be it from me to claim that was a mistake; while there were still times that he seemed to need his space – and let me have mine – I think things worked outContinue reading “Palm Tuesday”
Making Sure He’s Remembered
Dearest Rachel – Some days, I find myself focusing on myself – actually, that’s most days. I doubt it’s unique to me. For all that we’re forced to admit to being self-centered and blinkered when it comes to our perspective in life, the fact of the matter is that it’s the only perspective we have.Continue reading “Making Sure He’s Remembered”
Three Last Chances
Dearest Rachel – I have to admit, I woke up yesterday determined to write to you about Father’s Day, and the fact that I felt like I was being ignored during it; Daniel had told me that my mom suggested he go out and get a card for me, which he didn’t get around toContinue reading “Three Last Chances”
from Rachel: My Broken Relationships
Why do you suppose Proverbs says so much about relationships with fools? “Those relationships are the ones that tend to bring the most trouble into a person’s life.” Summarize in one sentence the teaching of the scriptures you just read. “Don’t hang around with fools – their foolishness is more easily transferred than your wisdom.”Continue reading “from Rachel: My Broken Relationships”
How Soon Until We’d Notice?
Dearest Rachel – There’s an old children’s-level joke that asks whether heat or cold is the faster, with the punchline being ‘heat… you can catch cold.’ At the risk of Aunt Florencing the joke (you’ll recall the reference, but I may have to explain this one to everyone else), I remember from even the firstContinue reading “How Soon Until We’d Notice?”
Would You Rather…?
Dearest Rachel – It would seem that, despite the fact that the power is supposed to be shut off again today as the electricians do their work, Daniel will be staying home. It’s not an act of defiance or anything; it’s more one of hospitality. It turns out that, for whatever reason, the water atContinue reading “Would You Rather…?”
Out With the Old
Dearest Rachel – Thanks to the drive down to Nashville and back, I’ve discovered that my iPhone contains a number of songs that I wasn’t really even aware of. When the two of us are listening to them on an infinite random shuffle, it’s interesting to hear something where one of us would comment howContinue reading “Out With the Old”
If You Can’t Take the Heat…
Dearest Rachel – Of course, the standard follow-up to that proposition is that you need to ‘get out of the kitchen.’ That, along with the expression about the buck stopping with him were among the most quotable lines from President Harry Truman (partly because much of what he said had to be sanitized for publicContinue reading “If You Can’t Take the Heat…”
The Old Way Home
Dearest Rachel – For all my talk about taking a different way down here, you might think it’s strange that I return to our normal course of action for the trip home. After all, there’s no more reason for us to leave in a hurry than there was for us to show up down hereContinue reading “The Old Way Home”
The Enchanted Box
Dearest Rachel – It’s the kind of day that makes one not want to head outside. Oh, it’s not raining buckets like it was last year, when I found Chompers on the opposite side of the driveway, toppled over in his wheelchair in the gulley. It’s actually perfectly sunny outside; too much so, in fact.Continue reading “The Enchanted Box”
Infinite Loop
Dearest Rachel – Sometimes it’s ridiculous what my mind comes up with overnight these days. Other times, it just ever so slightly depressing, if only for the fact that it spoils the fantasy. But you being you, you would ask about my dream in any event, and while the details are already starting to fadeContinue reading “Infinite Loop”
from Rachel: I Just Want Everyone to Leave Me Alone
For what other reasons to women pull back, hide, and want everyone to leave them alone? “Feeling tired and/or overwhelmed – needing some alone time, feeling hurt and vulnerable and therefore fearful of more hurt.” [starred for emphasis] a description of God’s love based on Ephesians 3:18 and John 3:16: The Breadth – For GodContinue reading “from Rachel: I Just Want Everyone to Leave Me Alone”
A Whole Lot of Nothing Going On
I’m going to do nothing, and I’m going to do it slowly. Leroy ‘Satchel’ Paige, when asked what he planned to do once he retired from baseball Dearest Rachel – It was a quote that my dad always liked to repeat about what he planned on doing with retirement, and it was something that I,Continue reading “A Whole Lot of Nothing Going On”
There’s A First Time For (almost) Everything
Dearest Rachel – So much has changed, even since the last time we drove down to see Kevin. Sure, last year already had so many things different about it, between your departure and Chompers in a wheelchair. But now, the old boy is gone, and suddenly, there is so much more space in the car,Continue reading “There’s A First Time For (almost) Everything”
A Wish For Autonomy
Dearest Rachel – I know I used to joke about how many of their cars we could buy with the shares we owned in the company, but it was always a bit of a concern as to how for one could actually travel in a given day in a Tesla. Really, it’s a disadvantage thatContinue reading “A Wish For Autonomy”
Fig Tree & Vineyard
Dearest Rachel – I know, I know; the title sounds like some cheerful little English pub: “Don’t wait up for me, luv, I’m off to the Figtree & Vineyard for a couple pints and a round a’darts with me mates. Be home when I’ve ’ad enough.” Not the sort of thing you’d ever expect –Continue reading “Fig Tree & Vineyard”
The Peace of C.O.D.
Dearest Rachel – I’d gotten the invoice late last week, and wrote the check out on Monday; I don’t like waiting when it comes to paying bills (back in the day, Dad would consider that a foolish attitude in his mother, but that was back when you could still earn interest on money that youContinue reading “The Peace of C.O.D.”
Judgement Call
Dearest Rachel – “You’re judging me!” I can almost hear the hurt in the voice that I’ve never heard (and will never hear). Whether it’s an act or not, I really couldn’t say; I may not be a cinematic devotee, but I’ve always appreciated an authentic acting performance. The trouble is, while I can doContinue reading “Judgement Call”
Nowhere Near “In Control”
Dearest Rachel – After drifting through a dream in which I could control the flow of events much like the art director from “Duck Amuck” (although rather more violently, as one of the individuals in this dream Twitter video was chucking grenades at whoever was filming it, and I was simply pausing the video toContinue reading “Nowhere Near “In Control””
Matin-tide Prayer
Father God – I know You heard my thoughts while I stood in the shower this morning. I wonder what Your thoughts were in return; were they along the lines of “well, it’s been a while, hasn’t it?” or “where have you been, My son?” as if you didn’t know. Time was, I used toContinue reading “Matin-tide Prayer”
from Rachel: I Just Want Everyone to Love Me
Anyone else want to join me here? “Yep, I have belonged to the ‘just love me’ club too.” Looks like you agreed with the author that you are conflict-avoidant, risk-averse, and easily pushed (although you preferred the term ‘manipulated,’ for all the difference it made). You did not consider yourself easily-bullied, work-yourself-into-oblivion, or a bigContinue reading “from Rachel: I Just Want Everyone to Love Me”
Too Much Emptiness
Dearest Rachel – Well, the boys just left for the convention as I got home from Bible study this morning. In fact, they were literally getting into Logan’s car as I reached the driveway, so I went around the block in order to allow him to pull out using the turnaround, rather than forcing themContinue reading “Too Much Emptiness”
The Scent of Paint
Dearest Rachel – After two straight days in which the painters have been working past five – in fact, to nearly six – in the evening, it was strange to come home from the ‘office’ this afternoon to an empty house. Guess they considered their work to be finished; no sense staying past that pointContinue reading “The Scent of Paint”
The Whimper of Chance
Dearest Rachel – It’s not exactly axiomatic, but it should go without saying that it’s the misadventures in life that make some of the best stories. This wasn’t the kind of misadventure where the worst possible thing happened, so it won’t be the most ripping of yarns. And yet, it had all the potential toContinue reading “The Whimper of Chance”
Very Nearly Giving Up
Dearest Rachel – I’ve occasionally lamented that, unlike the letters we exchanged between each of our graduations from college – between the time I acknowledged that you would have been the one I would have chosen to spend the rest of my life with, had I been offered the opportunity (the window of which IContinue reading “Very Nearly Giving Up”
Dismay For But A Moment
Dearest Rachel – Another day, another change of plans. Thank heavens that I’m adaptable, but it does make one’s head spin. And that’s without factoring in my morning congestion, and the stuff I take to combat it. It wasn’t even at this time yesterday – more like fifteen or so hours ago – that TimContinue reading “Dismay For But A Moment”
Don’t Buy Dünderbeck a Hot Dog
Dearest Rachel – I confess to never having been a fan of love poetry; for one, it takes too much effort to cobble together something that fits meter and rhyme, and for the other, once assembled, it sounds cobbled together, slightly off and unnatural. As much as I enjoy the stories told by Shakespeare’s plays,Continue reading “Don’t Buy Dünderbeck a Hot Dog”
A Date in Time
Dearest Rachel – I tend to take it as a good sign when I’m able to construct an entire story with my mind in my dreams. If nothing else, it suggests that I’m getting a full nights sleep in the process. I wish I could ask you about this story, because it seems so familiar,Continue reading “A Date in Time”
The Weekend That Just as Well Wasn’t
Dearest Rachel – Friday, May 27 I don’t know what it is; maybe it’s just the fact that I’m holing up in the man cave while Daniel and Logan watch anime together downstairs; maybe it’s that I’m watching a channel we used to view together (and, to be honest, you seemed to enjoy more thanContinue reading “The Weekend That Just as Well Wasn’t”
Would That It Had Meant Something
Dearest Rachel – This isn’t the day for me to be dwelling on having lost you – at least, no more than any other day. There are others who are supposed to be honored today, none of whom I know –or rather, have known – personally. It’s only recently that the difference between today andContinue reading “Would That It Had Meant Something”
Clearing One’s Sinuses
Dearest Rachel – There really is something to be said for T.S. Eliot’s theory of ‘the death of the author.’ The idea of it is that a work of art can and should be enjoyed without having to consider its creator’s biography or influences. It’s something of a take on the old saw that youContinue reading “Clearing One’s Sinuses”
from Rachel: I Think Too Much of Myself
Did you struggle with an intense focus on yourself in your teenage years? “Not like that, I was more of a Daria than a Quinn. But I was also rather a Hermione, so I definitely wanted all my work perfect to impress my teachers, and I relished in their praise and attention.” List some waysContinue reading “from Rachel: I Think Too Much of Myself”
Enduring the Echo
Dearest Rachel – Now that the construction is actually in progress, I’m getting a fair amount of flak from Daniel regarding the things he doesn’t like about it all. And there’s nothing wrong with him expressing an opinion; in fact, I’d prefer he say what he does and doesn’t like as opposed to giving aContinue reading “Enduring the Echo”
You Can Check Out Any Time…
Dearest Rachel – While I’m sure you know the rest of that line, I should be pointing out to you that it’s a bit of an exaggeration. This isn’t the Hotel California, here; it’s not that one can never leave when the team is here laying the floor; it’s just that you may just haveContinue reading “You Can Check Out Any Time…”
We Give Time Significance
Dearest Rachel – These days, it seems that you have to have a sense of humor to deal with what’s happening in the world each day. A sick sense of gallows humor, to be sure – probably along the lines of someone who would be an expert at Cards Against Humanity or something like thatContinue reading “We Give Time Significance”
Dismissed
Dearest Rachel – So, last night, in my dream, I got fired. Seriously, that was the basic gist of things. Daniel and I drove to my old office, and after I made sure he was at his job there (what that job actually was, I really couldn’t tell you – indeed, on the inside, theContinue reading “Dismissed”
Uncommon Nonchalance
Dearest Rachel – It seems I’m writing you a lot about yesterday’s events, as opposed to what’s going on today. For what it’s worth, today we are starting on a new phase of the project, with a whole different team, as the fellows who specializing in laying tile are going to be working on theContinue reading “Uncommon Nonchalance”
There Will Be Other Chances
Dearest Rachel – Yesterday, the carpenters were supposed to mount the new medicine cabinet in the master bathroom. However, for whatever reason, they were missing the kit that would allow them to attach it flush against the wall, so they had to order that separately today. So, the ‘before’ picture I took in the morningContinue reading “There Will Be Other Chances”
A Quick Change of Plans
Dearest Rachel – By rights, had everything worked out according to the original plan, Daniel and I should be re-packing again today. it’s a quick turnaround from last weekend, sure, but that’s when Memorial Day weekend falls, and we would traditionally drive down to the Nashville area to see Kevin. I’ve abandoned certain traditions sinceContinue reading “A Quick Change of Plans”
Wearing Down the Grindstone
Dearest Rachel – I think that, as long as I continue to write you every day, I’m not going to be able to let the 23rd of the month pass without comment. Much as I’d like to get over it, I don’t think it’s possible for me to do so for the foreseeable future, unlessContinue reading “Wearing Down the Grindstone”
The End of the Road
Dearest Rachel – I’m beginning to wonder if my running shoes should have come with an odometer, or some other means to indicate when I’ve gotten to the end of their useful life. They still cover and protect my feet from the elements, both above and beneath, but I can feel the difference in supportContinue reading “The End of the Road”
Up Too Soon
Dearest Rachel – After two days of mostly threatening – or outright raining – the sun is what comes pouring into our room… at 6:30 in the morning. Much as I’d like to sleep in that much longer, that’s just not going to be in the cards. You’d have probably gotten up this early yourselfContinue reading “Up Too Soon”
from Rachel: God Offers a New Attitude
God can make us new women this week. Are you willing to commit to his compassionate, transforming work? “No promises yet, sorry. It’s Wednesday already, also. Added” (signature) “Thursday after day 5” Write down some other attitudes that belong to the category of “bad.” “Lazy, selfish, pleasure-seeking, comfort-loving, work-avoiding, worldly and pursuing worldly pleasures andContinue reading “from Rachel: God Offers a New Attitude”
It Wasn’t That Important
Dearest Rachel – I can’t remember which year it was – after a certain point, they all tend to blur together, I’m afraid – but there was one other year that we couldn’t get a room in time at one of the four hotels surrounding the convention center (i.e., the Hyatt, the Hilton, the EmbassyContinue reading “It Wasn’t That Important”
No Choice But to Continue
Dearest Rachel – You would probably be pleased note I stayed awake during the entire two hour run of Anime Hell; no need for you to nudge me awake as I nodded off (a good thing, since you weren’t there to do so – I know now how those folks we would always see scatteredContinue reading “No Choice But to Continue”
Nerd Prom
Dearest Rachel – It never fails. You’d think that the convention would fill up the entirety of the Hyatt, where everything is based out of (or at least was, back in the old days. Nowadays, I suppose the convention center proper is the real hub for all the goings-on). Considering that the event books upContinue reading “Nerd Prom”
Milling About of a Midday… Maskless
Dearest Rachel – I’ll be honest, I wasn’t expecting that Daniel would have a lot of fun here in any event, given the restrictions that they seem to have in their rules and regulations. But so far, that doesn’t seem to have been nearly as bad as we feared. The only real problem he seemsContinue reading “Milling About of a Midday… Maskless”
Life in Escrow
“Do you have any brothers and sisters?”“Well, I have a big sister, a little brother, and we have a baby in escrow.”“In escrow?”“That’s how daddy describes it when it seems like it’s never going to come out.” Art Linkletter and a candid guest, as taken from Kids Say the Darnedest Things Dearest Rachel – Sometimes,Continue reading “Life in Escrow”
Inspectors General
Dearest Rachel – There’s a paradox to having so much going on in one’s life at a time (I was going to simplify that to ‘drama,’ but I don’t know how much of what’s going on really qualifies as such. Plus, I think of ‘drama’ as being somewhat self-inflicted, and while I suppose you couldContinue reading “Inspectors General”
I Should Be Panicking
Dearest Rachel – By this time tomorrow, if all goes well today, I’ll be driving the boys and myself off to Rosemont for the first Anime Central in three years. There are so many things to take care of before hand – both the usual things, like packing and shopping and such, and some not-so-usualContinue reading “I Should Be Panicking”
Travelling in Only One Direction
Dearest Rachel – Lars asked me yesterday, as we were walking through the forest preserve by Oakton College and Beck Lake, how much I’ve been telling you about what’s going on in my life. He suggests I not tell you quite as much as I do, if only for the fast that there are otherContinue reading “Travelling in Only One Direction”
Injudicious
Dearest Rachel – I told you before I’m trying to tiptoe around the subject of your absence with Daniel, even to the point of not sharing with him about Kerstin’s present for you. I’m not sure how and to what extent he feels your absence, especially after all this time. Occasionally I will ask howContinue reading “Injudicious”
Under the Weather
Dearest Rachel – It would seem that, somewhere along the way, Daniel has caught a cold. Neither of us knows from where, but it’s not an altogether unexpected situation; for all our love for the milder climate of spring and fall in comparison to the more extreme summer and winter May and November have neverContinue reading “Under the Weather”
My Fate in Dream
Dearest Rachel – Well, that was disconcerting… and downright terrifying in its plausibility, to a certain extent. What’s particularly strange is how calm –almost indifferent – I was to my own fate. The dream effectively started with my applying for a renewed drivers license (although, to be sure, the place didn’t look a lot likeContinue reading “My Fate in Dream”
This Was Different
Dearest Rachel – We’ve had mysterious visitations at our house from time to time since your passing. Some of them were serendipitous, like the balloon on my birthday. Some were deliberate, but anonymous, like the last couple of May Days. And then there was this: This was left on our doorstep yesterday afternoon. Someone hadContinue reading “This Was Different”
from Rachel: (God is Stronger Than My Struggles) With Stress/Anxiety
[starred for emphasis] “Yep, we can all pretend we’re doing fine with life’s stress, but the body will usually betray you and tell the truth.” How about you? Do you have any little stressors in your life? “Of course. On Monday (10/13/14) I drive to Macomb so that I can leave Chompers with mom andContinue reading “from Rachel: (God is Stronger Than My Struggles) With Stress/Anxiety”
To Think I Nearly Forgot
Dearest Rachel – Were you still here, this wouldn’t have happened, of course. I would have made preparations beforehand. I’d have checked with you as to what you would have wanted – and had it in hand to set on your nightstand when you awoke, along with a card (assuming it was something that wouldContinue reading “To Think I Nearly Forgot”
In Your Stead
Dearest Rachel – I always knew that I could find someone to replace you, but if I find someone to do the things we used to do together, that would be sufficient for the time being. It never occurred to me that I wouldn’t be the only one who needed someone to take your place,Continue reading “In Your Stead”
A Chance to Sleep In
Dearest Rachel – I don’t know about you, since we rarely ever used the phrase, but I always thought the expression ‘thank God it’s Friday’ was just a little shy of blasphemous. Maybe it was just profane. Sure, it could appropriately be applied to Good Friday, but an ordinary Friday? Not so much. And yet,Continue reading “A Chance to Sleep In”
Light Infantry
Dearest Rachel – You would think that I would learn to check what can be done before stating categorically that it can’t. It’s how I avoided conflict with you for the longest time; you would think I would know to do likewise with Daniel. You would be wrong. There are certain aspects of the remodelingContinue reading “Light Infantry”
Late Night Talk
Dearest Rachel – It may have had something to do with our discussion en route to last night’s Bible study. I don’t know how the subject came up but Daniel and I were sharing about how late night talk show hosts just aren’t what they used to be. For my part, I never took aContinue reading “Late Night Talk”
Insurance Against the Heat
Dearest Rachel – I’m sure you can guess, after yesterday’s letter, that I slept with the ceiling fan on. Indeed, I woke up so grateful for it – and for the misadventure brought it to be there. You know, I started this series of the letters as a form of therapy, but also as aContinue reading “Insurance Against the Heat”
Folding the Hedge
Dearest Rachel – Every so often, I come up with a title that needs some explanation; however, this is going to take some time for me to get to. Feel free to guess a little while I try to set the table here. I’ll give you a hint, though; it has absolutely nothing to doContinue reading “Folding the Hedge”
Suddenly Summer
Dearest Rachel – It’s a commonly-held truism here in the Chicago area (and, now that I think about it, throughout the Midwest – so you’d be just as familiar with it as I) that “if you don’t like the weather around here, just wait five minutes.” It’s an exaggeration to make a humorous point, ofContinue reading “Suddenly Summer”
No Substitute
Dearest Rachel – You know, if you were still here, I wouldn’t have anything to do with social media. It’s just no substitute for the real thing. But you aren’t, and I do. It’s not ideal, but you work with what you’re given. I was woken up this morning at twenty to six by theContinue reading “No Substitute”
Define ‘Temporary’
Dearest Rachel – At least it had nothing to do with the construction team. Shortly after noon on Friday, I had brought home lunch for Daniel and myself (well, since mine was a chorizo-and-egg burrito, it might been better characterized as ‘brunch’). We were hanging around in the dining/family room, surfing our various corners ofContinue reading “Define ‘Temporary’”
from Rachel: (God Is Stronger than My Struggles) With Loneliness
Remember your loneliest time? What details made it particularly difficult? “My most alone time was last August (2013) when I vacationed alone for a week, but I relished in almost every minute of it. I think the times I feel loneliest are when I’m surrounded by people, but they are already all in groups conversing.Continue reading “from Rachel: (God Is Stronger than My Struggles) With Loneliness”
I Wish I Had Taken More Pictures
Dearest Rachel – So, last night we met the girls for dinner. I’m not gonna lie, it was a bit of a fire drill; not gonna specify, either, because I’m not sure which nationality applies here – Chinese, Bavarian, or some other – and regardless, it’d probably be racist, or at least ethnist, to doContinue reading “I Wish I Had Taken More Pictures”
That Could Have Gone So Much Worse…
Dearest Rachel – That title pretty much sums up last night’s dream, honey. Don’t know where it came from; as cold as I may have felt, I did sleep in my clothes to mitigate the chill, so I shouldn’t have been feeling it in my unconsciousness. And as for the rest of it, well, IContinue reading “That Could Have Gone So Much Worse…”
Long Term Plans
Dearest Rachel – Well, wouldn’t you know it. Just yesterday, I was saying how I need to be telling you a bit more about Yvonne, and last night, she comes out and asks me some hard questions. So, it looks like I need to talk about her at this point. I will say that timeContinue reading “Long Term Plans”
Letters to Rachel 