Press ‘2’ For Snow

Dearest Rachel –

I just sent the letter out to you yesterday, but I wonder if I shouldn’t make ‘Retail Therapy’ a whole new category of story for me to tell you about. There have certainly been enough purchases that I could retroactively add the category to, and I’m sure that I will make more such semi-frivolous purchases going forward. It’s the nature of life; not everything we do or acquire is necessarily going to be useful (which suggests that real life violates Chekov’s Law constantly), even if we might think otherwise at the time.

To be fair, I had been thinking about this item even as I was putting that letter together; it just so happened that, by the time I finished writing what I did, my letter it already gotten fairly long, and I saw no point in extending it further. Besides, the item hadn’t arrived yet.

So, you’re probably wondering what kind of ‘item’ I’m talking about. Here you go:

Yes, it’s a blender, and yes, we (sorry… I) still have the one we got from our wedding, although it was a close call. When we were moving stuff back into the kitchen, Jan actually wondered aloud as to whether I was going to be keeping it. Indeed, she had me throw out the spice carousel (although considering that we’d already disposed of the spices when we moved everything out, and the plastic had faded from white to yellow – which is much more obvious in the new layout and color scheme – that was more than fair of her to insist upon).

Of course, it’s silly to equivocate a blender and a spice rack. There’s a lot more going on with the blender, between the gears and blades and electric motor – to say nothing of the food processor attachment. You’d be the first one to point out that the old thing still works just fine for its intended purpose. But this new machine seems to be geared toward our newfound taste for smoothies – and if we’re going to get any fruits and vegetables into our diet, that seems to be the way for us going forward. I’m not sure I’d trust the old machine for that, necessarily.

And as a test run, I’m doing something a bit lighter – not to mention, a bit less demanding in terms of clean-up – I’m making snow cones for the two of us.

It certainly seems to grind the ice up pretty well; it’s like a pitcher full of snowball material.

It doesn’t even require being at full strength to chop the ice up like this; I only need the middle setting to render it to this consistency. Although it turns out that ‘consistency’ isn’t quite the right word for it; after a certain point, the ‘snow’ sticks to the sides, and the blades can’t reach all that way over to grind it, leaving fairly large chunks to deal with. On the other hand, I’d over-filled the pitcher by a wide margin, so there was plenty to scoop out and fill a couple of glasses with.

I’m showing the syrup bottles just to prove that I didn’t serve one of mint and one of chocolate; I don’t think either of those flavors would make sense as snow cones. Heck, even root beer might be pushing it, since that’s more associated with ice cream floats. Still, it wasn’t half bad.

It wasn’t perfect; Daniel mentioned that I’d still scooped a few large chunks into his glass. But for a first time, I think it went reasonably well. Maybe I’ll have to go out shopping for some fruit chunks to grind up for the two of us, next time around, and let you know how that goes.

For now, though, keep an eye out for us, and wish us luck; we’ll both be needing it.

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I am Rachel's husband. Was. I'm still trying to deal with it. I probably always will be.

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