from Rachel: Formed for God’s Family

“May 7 “I’m really not sure. I already feel like my church(es) are my extended family. I do everything from hugging Agnes and Eleanor down to bathroom maintenance (changing toilet paper rolls and even unclogging a toilet once). “I suppose the area where I fall way short is with believers I don’t know. I rarelyContinue reading “from Rachel: Formed for God’s Family”

Love & Marriage

Dearest Rachel – Happy Sweetest Day, honey. It’s weird; we never observed this holiday together. We considered ourselves fortunate enough to remember Valentine’s Day and our anniversary for each other. So why am I bothering now, seeing as I don’t have any sweetest to make a day out of this? Well, since the anniversary ofContinue reading “Love & Marriage”

The Field Across the Fence

Dearest Rachel – I had a letter that I was planning for you, but I think I’ll let that wait until later today. After all, it isn’t as if we ever celebrated the third Saturday in October in any way different than we did any other Saturday; why, I don’t think we were aware ofContinue reading “The Field Across the Fence”

Twilight Memories

Dearest Rachel – The nights are getting longer; well, they’ve been getting longer since Daniel’s birthday nearly four months ago. But now that we’ve passed the vernal equinox, and the hours of darkness exceed those of light, it becomes that much more obvious… and painful. October, even out here on the internet, is a monthContinue reading “Twilight Memories”

How Much Will Be Carved Away?

Dearest Rachel – Occasionally, I will spot something or other left behind by Chompers that I have yet to give away. Kris took a number of things to give to her daughter (I think it was; it’s been well over a week since she was last by) to use with her own dog, but hisContinue reading “How Much Will Be Carved Away?”

The Games We Must Play

Dearest Rachel – For all that I said the other day about women who insist that they don’t want someone who ‘plays games’ – and yet they inevitably play games themselves – the fact of the matter is, there is really no getting away from playing games in this process of finding someone to fillContinue reading “The Games We Must Play”

Hurry Up and Wait

Dearest Rachel – Sometimes, the stories that I have planned to tell you have to be set aside. Not everything is urgent; not everything is time-sensitive. But sometimes, things come up. And that basically sums up today. So any story having to do with the dating app will need to wait for another day. IContinue reading “Hurry Up and Wait”

Replacement

Dearest Rachel – Well, if it’s here at church, no one’s seen it. So tonight, I bought myself a replacement Grief Share workbook. The few bucks spent on it are of little concern, but I’m none too thrilled about losing four weeks of notes. Still, this ought to guarantee that the old one shows upContinue reading “Replacement”

Ore Wo Sagashite

Anata, Rei-sama – 私は自分が誰であるか、そして人生と愛から何を求めているかを発見する必要があります。 そうでなければ、私は自分が「めぐみ」を見て、彼女があなたかエリンのどちらかであることを願っていることに気付くかもしれません。 Okay… hopefully, I’ve put off all of those who might be scared off by the gratuitous Japanese. We can talk in reasonable privacy. I’m starting this letter I’m sitting on a park bench in Kimball Hill Park, staring at the fountain in the middle of the lake. You and IContinue reading “Ore Wo Sagashite”

That Last Mile is So Much Longer

Dearest Rachel – I have to confess, this title is so true, but I didn’t even have the energy yesterday afternoon to even begin to describe the rest of the day. Especially since I never did find a charge cord downtown, meaning my phone had as little energy as I did. For what it’s worth,Continue reading “That Last Mile is So Much Longer”

Peripatetic Plans

Dearest Rachel – It’s five o’clock in the morning. I have absolutely no idea what might be going on in Erin‘s head right now – or in any of the other runners. For my own part, even as I’m sitting on my bed in the pitch dark, wondering whether to begin the day, I’ve gotContinue reading “Peripatetic Plans”

But Father, By Your Grace

Dearest Rachel – I almost feel the need to apologize for upstaging you today; this being Sunday, I would be posting (and I have posted) some of your notes from the Purpose-Driven Life journal you were working on in 2004. But this is likely to overshadow it, I’m afraid. Of course, why shouldn’t it? MarathonContinue reading “But Father, By Your Grace”

from Rachel: When God Seems Distant

“May 6, 2004 “I think I’ll need to remember this chapter is here and come back to it in the future whenever this dilemma arises. At present, I can’t relate – praise God. “Lately, my own distractions and preoccupations are the only distance I have felt from God (all me). Actually, I feel He’s beenContinue reading “from Rachel: When God Seems Distant”

Woefully Unprepared

Dearest Rachel – I imagine that this a sensation you were quite familiar with in your day; I woke up this morning realizing I haven’t done my homework for a long time – well, at least for this week. And as a result, I’m going to show up at the Bible study woefully unprepared forContinue reading “Woefully Unprepared”

The Point of Deception

Dearest Rachel – I had originally planned on writing you about how nice it was to have conversations first thing in the morning… but then, things took a bit of a turn. And I’m afraid this isn’t really a trip down memory lane. More often than not, while I would make a point of kissingContinue reading “The Point of Deception”

Public Cake

Dearest Rachel – Let me start out by saying that this is not a love story. And I feel like I should be apologizing for that. This whole collection of letters to you were supposed to be an outpouring of love and reminiscences about our time together and what you meant to me. And whileContinue reading “Public Cake”

A Kiss Atop the Lid

Dearest Rachel – I don’t know if you remember that scene in Tim Burton’s Batman Returns where Serena Kyle enters her apartment with that stock line, “Hi honey, I’m home!” followed by a quick beat, whereupon she adds, “Oh, yeah. That’s right; I live alone.” That’s what it’s like to come home these days. ItContinue reading “A Kiss Atop the Lid”

A Little More Meta

Dearest Rachel – Hey, I don’t mean to complain about you showing up in my dreams, but if you’re going to do it, could you at least stick around long enough for me to realize you’re there? There wasn’t much to this one; no visuals that I can remember (and at a little after fiveContinue reading “A Little More Meta”

Gotta Go Slower

Dearest Rachel – It’s been about a week and a half since the last time I walked to the office. Most of last week, of course, has been because Kevin has been over, but it isn’t as if I walk every day when I actually cross town, either. Yesterday, I was concerned about the threatContinue reading “Gotta Go Slower”

The Pointlessness of it All

Dearest Rachel – It hasn’t been the easiest night for sleeping, and I’m not entirely sure why. Maybe it’s because I allowed myself to fall asleep in the chair yet again – I’ve really got to stop doing that – but considering how short a period of time it was that I slept there, itContinue reading “The Pointlessness of it All”

Not Exactly Overtime

Dearest Rachel – I don’t know how long it’s been, but it’s been a very long time since I stayed at the ‘office’ past five o’clock. And yet, here I am. It’s one of those things I’m free to do, now that I’m not afraid that Daniel needs to be relieved from keeping an eyeContinue reading “Not Exactly Overtime”

Can’t Get Too Comfortable

Dearest Rachel – I swear, honey, I have got to learn – or perhaps, rather unlearn – about falling asleep in the rocking chair. Namely, that I really shouldn’t do that. It messes up my sleep schedule, breaking the night in half. The trouble is, it’s too comfortable in that chair. I watch videos withContinue reading “Can’t Get Too Comfortable”

Going Buy-Buy

Dearest Rachel – I let the first of the month get past me, but I was otherwise occupied with a houseguest, after all. Indeed, it wasn’t until last Thursday that I realized I had missed my Monday appointment at the mechanics for your car. Oh well, we can try again later this week, I guess.Continue reading “Going Buy-Buy”

Run Over By Karma

Dearest Rachel – Every so often, when I wake up, my body has this way of telling me that I’ve done everything wrong. Woke up cold and sore today, not because I’m coming down with something, but because I left the ceiling fan on (it was warm last night), and I fell asleep flat onContinue reading “Run Over By Karma”

That Much Emptier

Dearest Rachel – So Kevin just left this morning, and will likely be driving through the entirety of the day, arriving home after sunset. It’s the nature of the trip, and the distance involved. He’s going home to an emptier house than ours, which is why I really shouldn’t be complaining like I am. ButContinue reading “That Much Emptier”