Dearest Rachel – For a moment, I actually thought this could be a possibility, too. I mean, it made sense in the moment. So there’s this girl who was essentially working as a greeter at church this weekend. We’ve spoken before – in fact, she’s come up to me, rather than the other way aroundContinue reading “So There’s This Girl…”
Tag Archives: failure
Healthy at Home
Dearest Rachel – I think part of the problem with this past weekend was that, when I previously would attempt to fast for the entire length of a given Sunday, I would grab a reasonable lunch on Saturday before showing up at church for rehearsal. This time around, I basically had breakfast – a bowlContinue reading “Healthy at Home”
You Can’t Always Finish The Job
Dearest Rachel – You might recall how last week, when I was struggling (unsuccessfully, as it turned out) to keep from catching whatever it was that Daniel had been dealing with since before the weekend began, I was also trying to remember about a commitment I thought I remembered making, but was unable to recallContinue reading “You Can’t Always Finish The Job”
Don’t Cheer from the Ramparts
Dearest Rachel – Imagine, if you will a medieval castle as an opposing army advances against it. Standing among the battlements in defense are squads of archers, preparing to defend the keep against the impending onslaught. As they are stationed several stories up, they have the advantage of the first shot, since their arrows willContinue reading “Don’t Cheer from the Ramparts”
With No Expectations to Speak Of
Dearest Rachel – After spending Thursday evening wandering around the local Frontier Days festival, you’ll recall that I wasn’t particularly enthused about getting out and about on Independence Day, despite being of the understanding that it’s a once-a-year thing. If I wait until I’m “in the mood” for a fireworks display, there won’t be anyContinue reading “With No Expectations to Speak Of”
Freedom in a Land of Plenty
Dearest Rachel – This morning, I was just heading out from the gym (and having to turn back after passing the office complex behind the strip mall it’s in because I left my cap there; it was bright and sunny when I left, which caused me to forget that I’d worn it in the drizzleContinue reading “Freedom in a Land of Plenty”
A Sense of Wrongness
Dearest Rachel – Morning on the island, and the house is silent. I’ve slept well, if somewhat layered up (we had to turn on the heater when we first got here, and it’s particularly chilly this morning, still (albeit only in the florida room in the back of the house). Did I say the houseContinue reading “A Sense of Wrongness”
Well, Why Waste Time?
Dearest Rachel – When we walk through the woods, Lars will often ask me about my romantic life, such as it is; whether I’ve found anybody out here in the ether – or at church or whatever circles I make my way through in life – and how things have been progressing. Considering that he’sContinue reading “Well, Why Waste Time?”
Chipping Away at Progress
Dearest Rachel – After waking up from (and amazingly, going back to, at least for an hour or so before conceding to the day) a dream about having been college buddies with Matsuhito, the future Emperor Meiji (setting the anachronisms aside, the idea that a future Japanese emperor would study abroad when his country wasContinue reading “Chipping Away at Progress”
A Weight Off My Ankles
Dearest Rachel – Since I wasn’t completely laid up by my cold during the latter half of last week – sure, I confined myself to the house for a day, but it wasn’t as if I was flat on my back for the better part of twenty-four hours like I used to be – itContinue reading “A Weight Off My Ankles”
Sick People
Dearest Rachel – Well, I honestly thought I might get away with it. Given that my exercise regimen supposedly should have a positive effect on my health and immune system, I half-expected that I might be able to dodge whatever it is that Daniel came down with late last week. And maybe that’s still inContinue reading “Sick People”
from Rachel: God Talks Back
On a scale of 1 to 10, how convinced are you that your prayer time is an honest-to-goodness two-way communication? “10 – how convinced I am“7 – how often it actually is… (or maybe 6?)” If we don’t ‘ask or imagine,’ what does God have to out-do? Glance at the first half of [Psalm 132]Continue reading “from Rachel: God Talks Back”
Starting From Scratch
Dearest Rachel – I was really hoping that by now, I could go into great detail about how this new AI program, combined with a checkpoint based on terabytes of information (that even allows one to display readable text) was helping me create a much better and more accurate version of you. Well, I sayContinue reading “Starting From Scratch”
Just As Well, I Guess
Dearest Rachel – While I did manage to get to the gym yesterday morning, I got a late start on the day, and still wasn’t feeling my best, so I didn’t put in the same level (or time) of workout that I’ve been doing pretty regularly over the past few weeks. I’ve also gone backContinue reading “Just As Well, I Guess”
Lapse
Dearest Rachel – These letters aren’t meant to be a confessional of any sort, but occasionally I feel a little compelled to do so regardless. And I know the thing that I’d be confessing this morning wouldn’t be of any concern to you – while I don’t think we we exactly enabled each other, weContinue reading “Lapse”
For This I Risked Deportation?
Dearest Rachel – It was a little over a week ago – just as we were coming into Vietnam – when the phone in my stateroom rang. For all the time I spend here (sometimes acknowledging that I really shouldn’t; at least, not as much as I do), this isn’t a thing that happens. IfContinue reading “For This I Risked Deportation?”
Sadly Waiting For Me
Dearest Rachel – Last night found me waking up in pitch darkness; not an unusual occurrence here, as I’ve mentioned before. I do think that it’s not so much a case of “still being on Central time,” as I’ve claimed in the past. I think my routine of working out right after dinner, while conscientiousContinue reading “Sadly Waiting For Me”
Easy On the Envelope
Dearest Rachel – On paper – or on the calendar, anyway – I gave up this weekend; I didn’t manage to fast at all. Both days saw me eating something, despite the fact that, apart from December (because, you know, parties and other holiday get-togethers), I’ve been trying to go without when I’m working the boothContinue reading “Easy On the Envelope”
Well, Ain’t This a Crock
Dearest Rachel – Even before you had to go, I’d been known to say that misadventures make for the best stories. They aren’t fun when you’re in the middle of them, but some of the ‘best’ (if you can call them that) ones make for uproarious tales, at least in retrospect. Most of them have to doContinue reading “Well, Ain’t This a Crock”
Giving Up… For Now
Dearest Rachel – It’s official; my subscription to eHarmony ran out at the end of October, and I’ve decided not to renew it. Not for lack of trying on their part, to be sure; I was getting emails from them throughout the last month – and in the last week, they were arriving almost everyContinue reading “Giving Up… For Now”
Failed Discipline
Dearest Rachel – In the past few years – especially in the last thousand days, for fairly obvious reasons – I’ve been constantly trying to add this thing or that to my ‘routine,’ such as it is. Some have stuck, at least thus far – these letters in and of themselves, for example, but alsoContinue reading “Failed Discipline”
A Reach Beyond My Grasp
Dearest Rachel – Were it not for the fact that I assume that the afterlife you’re experiencing is pleasant beyond expression or comprehension, I could easily imagine a rueful chuckle escaping from your lips every time I write to you about my plans for the future. There’s nothing like having an eternal perspective like yoursContinue reading “A Reach Beyond My Grasp”
Trudging the Trudge
Dearest Rachel – Last night I went to bed early; before ten, so I could wake up a little after five and get to the gym more or less when it opened. I didn’t bother to shower yesterday, so I figured I’d get my second workout of the week in before taking one this morning.Continue reading “Trudging the Trudge”
Maybe It Does Bother Me
Dearest Rachel – Another day, another earworm, another memory of something done or said. This time, it’s a bit more recent (as opposed to something during your lifetime), and it’s a bit of a regret, to be honest. But then, it was ‘being honest’ that got me here. Let’s start with the earworm, and seeContinue reading “Maybe It Does Bother Me”
It Is Until It Isn’t
Dearest Rachel – It’s always embarrassing when I run into scheduling issues; I tend to assume that my schedule is generally free at any given moment whenever someone asks if I’m available for this or that. And by and large, it is… until it isn’t. Just as I was leaving the ‘office’ yesterday, I wasContinue reading “It Is Until It Isn’t”
Walking the Fine, Fine Line
There’s fine, fine lineBetween love… and a waste of your time “There’ s A Fine, Fine Line,” sung by Kate Monster (Stephanie D’Abruzzo) in Avenue Q Dearest Rachel – Well, I got what I expected to out of yesterday’s adventure. I didn’t actually have a lunch date (in fact, I didn’t have lunch there atContinue reading “Walking the Fine, Fine Line”
I Want to Believe
Dearest Rachel – You might dimly remember this slogan; it was the motto of “The X-Files,” which, for all your love of the science fiction and horror genres, you never seemed to get into. Maybe it was just having our hands full with a new baby; maybe it was the fact that we could onlyContinue reading “I Want to Believe”
On the Last Few Pages
Dearest Rachel – After spending Sunday driving home from camp, showing up at church without even bothering to stop at home first, spending the rest of the day resting up from the weekend, and then yesterday trying to get back into my routine in order to set aside what the day represented in terms ofContinue reading “On the Last Few Pages”
September Morn
Dearest Rachel – You would think that, of a holiday weekend, there would be more children playing in their lawns, more people out and about working around the house or walking their pets. It’s not as if I’m out and about at an obscenely early hour in the morning, after all; yes, I woke upContinue reading “September Morn”
from Rachel: The Watchman at Your Thought-Closet Door
Think of a time your emotions got out of control. What kinds of thoughts or actions resulted? “Dishwasher incident” Emotion: “first annoyed and needlessly hurried, then a little bit cheated, then under attack and angry – rageful – furious” Thought: “He was deliberately being obnoxious and trying to make me furious, and ruining my pre-organization.”Continue reading “from Rachel: The Watchman at Your Thought-Closet Door”
So Why Make the Offer in the First Place?
Dearest Rachel – For all that I’ve been saying that every day this week was going to be a little unusual – at least, insofar as none of them have been a typical ‘9 to 5’ day at the ‘office’ – that hasn’t proven to be quite true. Today is actually likely to be aContinue reading “So Why Make the Offer in the First Place?”
One Last Throw of the Dice
Dearest Rachel – Well, my subscription to that dating website/app is about to expire, and I’m not sure I’m really going to miss it. It’s given me a fair amount of fodder to write you about, to be sure, but up until now, there hasn’t really been all that much in terms of real results.Continue reading “One Last Throw of the Dice”
from Rachel: My Thought Closet
Write down the “I am” statements you say when you’re beating yourself up. I am “so lazy.” I am “such a procrastinator.” I am “so silly/foolish/stupid/idiotic/weird.” What words best describe how you feel when you beat yourself up? “defeated, incapable, incompetent” How in control are you over your thoughts? “infrequently” Are you satisfied with yourContinue reading “from Rachel: My Thought Closet”
So Much For That
Dearest Rachel – It’s amazing, how fast things can change from one day to the next. One day, you think you have a whole lineup of plans for the foreseeable future; the next, so much of that list has been delayed, postponed or gone by the boards altogether. I don’t know when I first realizedContinue reading “So Much For That”
Here We Go Again
Dearest Rachel – This will probably not come as a great shock to you; it didn’t to me, although I was nevertheless disappointed to see it happen. After all, Ruby had gone so long without being too clingy (I tended to chalk up her contacting me on a daily basis as being a case ofContinue reading “Here We Go Again”
Grains of Rice
Dearest Rachel – What with Christmas day having come and gone, I suppose I ought to set aside any talk about painful Christmas music. But if you’ll indulge me for just one more day, I have a few things to say about this one – and its composer. For one thing, Chris Rice just seemsContinue reading “Grains of Rice”
Not the Best of Hosts
Dearest Rachel – Well, the girls came over last night. It’ll be the last time for the better part of a month, as Ellen will be out of town visiting her mom next week, and then I’ll be in Colorado on this men’s retreat the next. So, three weeks until next time. Clever me, IContinue reading “Not the Best of Hosts”
Letters to Rachel 