Hidden Agendae

Dearest Rachel –

One of the ways that I can tell that I’m really back home – apart from the obvious facts of my surroundings – is the fact that not only can I tell the difference between days, but paradoxically, my weekends are busier than the days of the week. For most people, of course, the weekend is the chance to kick back and relax from the rigors of the work week; however, being unemployed (or perhaps more accurately, under-employed), I don’t find myself dealing with those anymore. Meanwhile, I’m resuming some of those commitments that I’d been referring to occasionally while on the trip that I have to physically be here to keep up with, such as my work in the A/V booth at church; I’ve been placed on the schedule for the next three consecutive weekends, in fact. All of which hardly comes as a surprise, as I’ve fallen behind on these duties – it’s only fair that I pick up the slack now that I’m back. But it does take up large chunks of both days that comprise the weekend.

Now, I want to make it perfectly clear that I don’t begrudge this; this is one of the things I rather missed after a while of being away. I could get certain things done, thanks to the internet and the robust connectivity the ship had, but there are some things that need to be done in person, and this is one of them. And I don’t mind telling you, it’s nice to be needed, even if it is for a task that seemingly anyone could do, given just a little bit of training. One of the things that struck me about my attempts to connect with the local megachurch a year and a half ago or so was that their main thrust wasn’t so much to serve as a Christian dating service (which, as I admitted at the time, felt a little crass to have such a hidden agenda – or maybe not so hidden), as to reassure us singles that “we understand that the church feels like it’s geared toward couples and families, leaving you out in the cold; but you can be single and have a place in the church family, too.” The thing is, I already have a place in my home church, that’s not my problem. I just don’t want to be single forever – this seemed like a good place to find a rather large number of Christian women my age or thereabouts – but you’re trying to tell me that being single is okay, which is what I’m not ready to hear. And even if I was, I could come to terms with it at home just as easily at home; I don’t need to uproot myself to find my niche and prosper and bless others on my own, thank you very much.

So here I am, beginning a day with large chunks of it already committed to one thing or another. Be it the men’s Bible study first thing in the morning (although, being a holiday weekend, they’re getting together at a local pancake house for breakfast; to be honest, it’s a perfect way to ease myself back into this particular routine) or showing up for rehearsal at mid-afternoon, I don’t have a lot of time to myself to do as I please.

Which is a bit problematic, as the boys seem to be of a mind to head out to one or another electronics store in order to replace the family room television. I think I told you about how the house endured a power surge early on after my departure; it seems that, after well over a decade or so (maybe even fifteen years?) of faithful service, the old thing gave up the ghost. They’ve been making do by watching stuff in my bedroom – for all my attempts at building a ‘man cave’ upstairs in what we used to call ‘the yellow room,’ Logan has made it his own in a way that he doesn’t think Daniel would be comfortable with (which is ironic, considering that this discomfort is mostly due to the mess he’s made of it; you’d think he would know that we’d lived with messes for a very long time. Maybe it’s just a kind of things that make up that mess that he’s self-conscious about) – or, now that I’m back, on the computer in my office upstairs, while I watch what I want to in my bedroom. I mean, I’m just as happy to host them in my room, but our tastes don’t always coincide

It shouldn’t be all that problematic; there are several places fairly nearby that have decent prices and good selection, and most importantly, will be willing to come out and install it, as I don’t know what to do about that frame that our current one hangs on. We’ve figured out the size of screen that we need – specifically, we don’t want it to be too big, otherwise, that frame won’t hold it (to say nothing of that fairly small pillar of wall it’s attached to). It would be nice if the trip wouldn’t take too long to accomplish.

This is especially since I still have a few items on my agenda to take care of between now and then. When Daniel and I visited Costco the other day, I forgot to get some more athletic socks, and probably a few hand towels, if I’m going to be hitting the gym on a more regular basis going forward, so I need to get back there again. Also, my visit to the broker reminded me that we had a few items in your kist that have matured; some rather long since, in fact. There’s no point in hanging onto them here, when they could be reinvested elsewhere and earning interest or dividends. So, despite the fact that we’re coming up on a holiday weekend, and I can’t do much with these funds at the moment, I’m going to see if I can’t stop by the bank and at least get these cashed and deposited in the checking account.

Can I squeeze all of this in the few hours between breakfast and rehearsal? I really couldn’t tell you, honey. All I can ask is for you to keep an eye on me, and wish me luck, as I’m pretty sure I’m going to need it.