It Won’t Be This Quiet Again

Dearest Rachel –

I’m actually overstating things. There may yet be a couple of more days when I’m home and Daniel is off doing his own thing. And once the rooms are done, and the contractors are gone, I expect we may go back to our typical routines, leaving the house fairly silent from time to time. But these past several hours, where I’m the only one in the house (and even I’m not doing much), will be moments that will be few and far between for the next couple of months.

It took me a couple of hours to realize it, too. Daniel had gone to the Saturday service (joining the folks, who had to get a Covid test today before Dad has his pacemaker looked at on Tuesday, and thus couldn’t go this morning) while Jenn and Doris and I drove home yesterday, so he didn’t come with me to church. Rather, he’s out with Kerstin at a different church service while I went to the early one this morning. All of which means that, when I got home, I arrived to an empty house that has stayed empty for a number of hours – and I have no idea when that situation might change. Yes, technically, as soon as I got home, it was no longer empty. You know what I mean.

Of course, there’s only so long I can stand this much silence. Either I nod off here in this chair – which I’m already on the verge of doing, despite the noise and activity coming from the YouTube screen – or I get up and do something, like the laundry. And as tempting as I am to do the former – and as much as I might need some more sleep – I decide to get up, and fill the machine for one more round of clothes before the end. Besides, I’ll need to be getting up soon enough; I’ve gotten in touch with Kevin and the girls, and we’ll be connecting for games an hour earlier than usual.

So, as much as I feel like I should be taking advantage of the silence, I just don’t think I can; at least, not right now. Maybe I’ll have more of it to deal with tomorrow after my doctor’s appointment. I’m sure there will be times after everything’s built up.

But for now, I’ve just gotta keep moving.

Until then, honey, keep an eye out for me. I love you, and I’ll talk to you later.

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I am Rachel's husband. Was. I'm still trying to deal with it. I probably always will be.

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