from Rachel: Psalm 19:13

“Keep your servant also from willful sins; may they not rule over me.
“Then will I be blameless, Innocent of great transgression.
“(Write list of opposites of spirit. Show to someone)”

Dearest Rachel –

There are times when I really wish I knew the context behind some of the notes you left behind for me to find – although that is surely not what you intended. Honestly, you seem to have kept a lot of secrets about yourself – things written down for nobody’s eyes but your own. And yet you kept them scattered about the house for someone to find, presumably for you to refer to at some critical time.

Of course, most of these had gotten well buried amongst the detritus of old newspapers and clothing and what have you, so… I can only guess at your intent with some of these.

This looks like it had been part of a class, with an attached assignment. That part seems to have been lost – or maybe it will turn up someday as I continue to dig through your side of the bedroom. Who knows?

It may just be irrelevant whether I find it or not, really; it would simply be a list of sins, or rather, sinful attitudes, that the verse (and therefore, you) is asking to be kept away from. The summary is all that the prayer needs; if you had specifics at the time, well, that is over and done with at this point, isn’t it?

Once again, you’ve left me a reminder to keep from these things, too (even as I struggle to write this, since Chompers is interrupting me every other sentence with his ‘I’m not happy’ whine, and I’m getting frustrated at my inability to solve matters for him. So clearly, I need to ask for His help staying away from anger). Thank you, honey.

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I am Rachel's husband. Was. I'm still trying to deal with it. I probably always will be.

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