Ten Dollar Bills

Dearest Rachel –

Sometimes, it amazes me as to what can set me off with regard to memories of you. I just got a ten dollar bill in change from the grocery store this morning, and while I didn’t actually absent-mindedly think “oh, another one I can give to Rachel for tips – oh, wait…” it wasn’t that far removed.

Today is Wednesday, when you would have had a standing appointment at 11:30 at the chiropractors’ for a back adjustment. While the therapy was basically covered under our insurance, you always liked to tip the doctor’s assistant (who I believe was his wife; another family practice, like our dentists’) a ten-spot for her work.

I know this because just that last week or so before, you had asked me to see if I could gather up a few ten dollar bills, as you were running low. ATMs cough out 100s, 20s and 5s… but never any tens. So I did what I could, and turned three or four over to you by that last Wednesday.

I just caught a glimpse of several of them sitting on your purse as I left for the office this morning, too.

For what it’s worth, I did cancel your appointments the Wednesday after. They did not ask why over the phone, nor did I volunteer that information. In retrospect, I probably should have – everyone else we know professionally is aware of your passing by now, even the girls at the Splash Dog therapy. We were friends with the couple running the clinic, too – to the point of visiting them at their house for games a number of years ago.

But that was so many years ago. So I can’t even remember their names – well, their surname I think I know, it’s the name of the clinic, isn’t it?

So I’m stuck with these tens… and another one this morning… and everything still reminds me of you. I’ll get them spent eventually, I suppose…

Until next time, honey… remember, I love you.

Published by randy@letters-to-rachel.memorial

I am Rachel's husband. Was. I'm still trying to deal with it. I probably always will be.

One thought on “Ten Dollar Bills

  1. “Everything reminds me of you….” I get that Randy. I journaled like crazy when my brother died (not like losing a spouse, I know). I often say it saved me. thank you for giving us a peek into memories and thought of Rachel. Love you, Randy


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