It Can’t Rain Forever

Dearest Rachel –

While I might point out that I’m still sleepy this morning from having stayed up later than usual with Daniel watching videos last night – and I may have gotten a little too smug about dropping my weight down to two-oh-six after yesterday morning’s workout (had leftover salad to serve as my main course, but just had to pick up a ‘side dish’ from a local burger joint, with predictable results) – the real reason I’m having difficulty getting started today is simply from the fact that it’s darker outside at this hour than it has been for a while. Moreover – and this is why it’s darker – it’s raining today, as it’s been predicted to do for a little while now. I hardly need to tell you that dark and rainy are not conditions that encourage one to leave the house any sooner than one has to.

It’s not like I didn’t know it was coming; Lars arranged for us to walk on Monday this week for such very reason, because the rest of the week was supposed to be rather inclement. Indeed, on the mornings I’ve made it to the gym since, I’ve seen the images on the television screens above the storefront window; there’s been a storm cell sweeping all the way up from Texas, across the Mississippi and Ohio river valleys and reaching into Pennsylvania and New York. Up until now, though, Chicago has been on the ragged edge of that predicted storm; just on the fringes, and enough so that we haven’t been touched by any of it, despite being told that we might be as many as fifty hours ago. No longer.

I get that weathermen have to hedge their bets, especially with regard to the edges of the storm cells they map out – after all, we’ve spent the last couple of days on those edges, where the predicted impact never seemed to come – and that it isn’t necessarily going to be raining at any given moment when someone pokes their head outside. But you’d think there would be a point, like at the moment, when they could skip the weasel words like ‘chance’ and ‘likely,’ and just say “it’s going to rain” here or there. Because it is; even if I don’t actually get hit by a raindrop on the bill of my cap, I can hear it on the roof of our bedroom – which is why I’m having a hard time getting started on this morning. If it weren’t for the fact that my back feels a bit stiff, I’d just as soon roll over and go back to sleep again; if nothing else, it’s dark enough – at seven in the morning (in May!) – that I think I could do so, all else being equal.

But having gotten up, stuck my head outside for a quick photo and gotten some five hundred words into this letter, I doubt that sleep is going to come for me all that quickly. I might as well get on with the day, even if that means driving to the gym in order to stay relatively dry.

In the meantime, I’ve also taken the time to offer my usual greeting to Lee; the usual encouraging word as she makes her way off to work at that obscenely early hour. I have to admit – even as I understand it’s what she has to do for her job – the fact that she’s willing to make her way there at an hour at which it will never really be all that light out is an admirable quality. She can’t afford to wait for the sunlight to jumpstart her, even on days that eventually become bright and sunny, so the gray and rainy days can’t affect her motivation. Still, I felt compelled to remind her that it wasn’t as if the rain was going to go on forever… which somehow reminded me of this song from back when we were in college:

To be fair, “Lee” isn’t going through the level of angst that whoever the singer is addressing is, but at the same time, there’s nothing like a gray and cloudy day to evoke that kind of reaction. And yet, by making the effort to be encouraging to someone I still have yet to actually meet in person, I can’t help but dwell that much more on the chorus.

The sun is going to shine again
‘Cause it can’t rain forever
Emptiness and lonely nights
Are not what God intended

This, too, shall pass.

Granted, that goes for the good times just as much as the bad times; nothing lasts forever, be it rain or sun. But at least, when it is raining, we can take comfort in that fact. When it’s sunny, well… we can try to make an effort to remember the moment, and save the memory for when that’s the only way to access it.

And to that end, I might as well get on with my day; I might even get in a few miles at the gym yet. Keep an eye on me, whatever I decide to do, and wish me luck, honey. I’m going to need it.