The Lark and Owl

Dearest Rachel –

It sounds like some quaint British pub, doesn’t it? Maybe one attached to a bed-and-breakfast in some seaside resort town overlooking the English Channel or on the Isle of Wight. The B&B would service the morning people (the larks), while also providing a place for the night owls to sleep off their time in the pub from the evening before.

Of course, while such a place may or may not exist in real life (and why not? It seems like an absolute natural for a brand name – and maybe a good idea for another T-shirt design), I obviously don’t have reality in mind as such. Or perhaps, I have too much reality in mind to tie it to a specific place. The Lark and Owl isn’t so much an actual place as it is a way of life for so many people, for better or worse (and the reference is intentional).

It’s almost like one attracts the other; at some point, a morning person falls for (or befriends) a night owl, or vice versa. As long as they travel in similar circles during working (or school) hours, neither one might be aware of the other’s proclivities. But at some point of proximity, the truth comes out. One will “pumpkin out,” as I used to refer to it, at an hour at which the night is still young I the other’s eyes, or the first will be running around like a madman when everyone ought to still be asleep in bed. It can be quite a cultural shock when realization dawns. Now, some people make it work out (like you and I), while others… not so much.

This is what crosses my mind as I wander through the ship on any given morning this past week in a state of self-exile from the room as Lars slumbers. As always throughout this week, when I’m awake (and not tethered to a charging station for my phone’s sake), I need to constantly be on the move. I have never been able to achieve true “vacation mode” the way he has. Then again, it could be argued that I no longer need to unwind to such an extent, anyway. The only thing I’ve wanted to escape from back home has been the frightful cold; and while I don’t look forward to having to confront it again in the next day or so, I’m happy enough to be on my way back – an attitude I was never able to have back in the day with our many travels (at least, not until our last couple, at any rate). Back then, I would constantly be dreading the return to the routine, and all that entailed. Here, I’ve sufficiently unwound to begin with that I’m fine, wherever I am.

One way this unwound nature manifests itself is on the other side of the day. It seems that I’m able to fall asleep at night, early and quickly – and sleep soundly – in such a way that Lars is envious. Apparently, while he can relax during the day, he has a harder time at night, relatively speaking. So in a way, it all evens out, I think. I’m considerably more kinetic when awake, while he maintains a more steady state of relaxation throughout.

Which is probably for the best for him. It’s not for me to tell tales out of school on him (and it’s not as if I recall many of the specifics anyway), but he’s had a lot on his mind over the last few years – and I’m afraid my own mental state in light of your departure has been one of them. He takes on so many other people’s burdens – you can’t take the physician out of him, you know? – that the time away ought to do him good, even if it means that we discover how out of sync the two of us are on a fundamental basis.

It’s not as if any two people are completely going to function in unison, anyway; as the saying goes, if two people agree on everything, one of them is unnecessary. We just have to give each other space where necessary, and walk together where possible.

Toward that end, honey, keep an eye on the two of us, and wish us luck. We’re going to need it.