Dearest Rachel –
This is not an observation (complaint?) that is unique to me, of course; even this past Sunday saw your own notes drift toward similar financial concerns that plagued us throughout almost all of our time together. And it’s not as if our situation was unique, either; financial issues are literally the number one marriage killer, rather than emotional or sexual issues, like some might think. The current economic climate isn’t helping matters with a lot of people, either, although I dare say that Daniel and I will be able to weather the storm for now (although I’m still a little worried as to how much he’s learning about being able to do this on his own, but at present, there’s not much I can do but handle the household expenses that I’m responsible for, which are most of them, and delegate what I can to him, which aren’t many).
It’s mildly frustrating, though, that whenever I think I’ve got everything under control, and the flow of funds, both in and out, have been suitably balanced, something comes up to throw me off. It seems to happen at least once every month, too, so it isn’t as if I’ve ever really gotten to the point where we’ve had a month that was completely smooth, without some major expenditure to rock the boat.
Of course, some of those expenditures have been completely discretionary, so I have no right to complain about them. Items like the latest computer for the ‘office’ weren’t urgent purchases; I could have limped along for a while with the system I already had (in fact, I just fired up that old box yesterday, in order to copy off a tranche of AI-generated artwork, specifically the descriptions, in order to see what those instructions might generate in the newest base models such as Flux and SD3.5). There have also been times when I’ve sent money to this or that cause; technically, I could have left those to someone else to pick up the slack, as they are larger by far than I am. I doubt, though, if you had heard about them, that you would have thought it acceptable to do so. So there’s that.
Whenever you are able, ·do [L do not withhold] good to people who ·need help [or deserve it]. If you have what your neighbor asks for, don’t say, “Come back later. I will give it to you tomorrow.”
Proverbs 3:27-28, Expanded Bible
At the same time, there are other, involuntary issues that I’d rather not have to deal with, but when they come up, they need to be dealt with, and immediately, hang the expense. The air conditioner was a case in point, and that was barely a month ago. And as it so happened, I had to call the same place again this week for another home repair issue.
I don’t know if I first heard it Sunday evening or Monday morning on my way to the gym – well, I know I heard it on Monday, but I might have noticed (and ignored it, as there wasn’t much I could do about it at the time) on Sunday as well – but there was this trickling noise going on, much like when the old air conditioner would run full blast and generate enough condensation to send down the drain in the utility room. In other words, it wasn’t a sound we hadn’t heard before, but it was unusual enough to suggest an issue that might require looking into, especially since the air conditioner wasn’t a likely culprit, being brand spanking new and not particularly needed in late October (especially at night or in the early morning).
Upon returning from the gym (when it was starting to grow light out and I could see what was going on down there), I decided to head to the utility room and check things out.
To a certain extent, this didn’t come as so much of a surprise as it might have. Sure, our last water heater survived for nearly thirty years (and we only realized it needed to be replaced when it all but stopped giving us sufficient hot water for our showers, because it was filled almost to the top with sediment), and that meant that this one had barely lasted half that length of time, but even when the team was here for the air conditioner, they noted watermarks on the floor under the tank, as if it had been leaking only enough to leave its mark, but not so much that it wouldn’t have time to evaporate. They mentioned in passing that these things aren’t expected to last as long as our first one; in fact, ten to twelve years is about as good as one can expect these days – as the old cliché goes, “they don’t make ’em like they used to.”
It’s still astonishing that it’s been fifteen years since we replaced that, though. Sure, Sears has finally dried up and blown away (so we couldn’t get a repairman even if we wanted one), as have you, so I guess I should know this, but it doesn’t seem like it’s been so long as all that.
In any event, the job – including the new tank (and water valve) and the hauling away of the old one – will run us well into the four figures; it’s an expense I wasn’t expecting to have to deal with. Then again, it’s not a third of what I had to pay for the air conditioner, so I guess I’ve had to deal with worse. There is something nice about the fact that this is more of a nuisance (including having to have the water shut off while they perform the work – nothing makes you suddenly need water like having it taken from you; I don’t know why) that something to panic over; “where are we going to come up with the money to cover this?” All the same, it’s not the sort of thing that I really wanted to have to deal with, as I keep thinking that everything is in order, only for something else to go wrong that needs attention.
Ironically, yesterday saw another large item show up that has to be addressed; the semi-annual auto insurance bill. I still remember when the cost of covering our two cars barely amounted to a hundred bucks a month (in fact, that amount may have been sufficient to cover all three of our cars); now, it’s more than tripled in price, making it a bigger deal, financially speaking, than the hot water heater. Again, the nice thing about your parents’ – and their parents’ – efforts is that this isn’t a big deal to cover; just move this amount from that account, and there you go. But this is the sort of thing that, back in the day, would have had us sweating, much like so many others do these days.
I wish you were here so I could thank you in person (among so many other things), but at least I thought you ought to know about this. I know that where you are and what you’re doing is orders of magnitude better than any satisfaction of having this or that taken care of down here (and in the span of time when it has to be fixed, it’s a lot less enjoyable than what qualifies as ‘normal’ even here), so that’s not the sort of thing that would bring you running, even if you could. Still, if you have the chance, I hope you might still be able to keep an eye on us, and wish us luck, as we’re probably still going to need it.
Letters to Rachel 