At Participating Locations, While Supplies Last

Dearest Rachel –

While I’m sure that, to a certain extent, I coddle both Daniel and his friend Logan a bit more than I should, given that they’re supposedly grown men who should be able to pay their own way in life at their age, I don’t know that I can really help myself. I’m used to paying for three for dinner on those times I decide to go out. Admittedly, those times are a lot rarer now, as Logan often has his own schedule (mostly involving his family, but occasionally he will go out on his own socially as well); for all that the boys are close friends, he isn’t family.

One of the ways that manifests itself is that I rarely consult with Logan regarding where he wants to eat when it comes to going out or picking something up. To be sure, when I pick something up for the boys on Saturday evenings when I’ve been working in the booth, more often than not the place Daniel sends me to has been decided by Logan, simply because he’s more decisive about what he wants that evening, as opposed to Daniel. However, I rarely consult with him directly, as if he has an influence on what I do or where I go, even if it’s just for the two of them. 

So yesterday was a bit of an exception to the rule when he suggested that we each pick up a pizza from a local chain that was celebrating its 60th anniversary by offering their standard 14 inch pie at the price they sold them when they first opened their doors. And while the place is not a favorite of mine by any stretch of the imagination – there’s something about the crust that I just don’t fancy, among other reasons that I find harder to explain – that kind of deal doesn’t come around very often (maybe once every sixty years or so, I guess?), so I was willing to entertain his recommendation.

The trouble was, their nearest outlet – which is within walking distance, although not the closest restaurant to the house (that would probably be the Mexican place right next door to the gym I go to most mornings, which has offered the occasional tempting smell when I make my daily pilgrimage in the morning, depending on the time) – was not participating in this one-time special price offer (and I should point out that their pizzas are a bit on the pricey side in comparison to most places in the area, which is another reason I rarely consider the place as an option for dinner – that, and the fact that I’ve discovered just how caloric a pizza can be, between the carbs in the crust and the grease of both the cheese and meat, oh my goodness. I probably always knew this, but I never gave the matter much thought until recently), so we needed to track down a location that was offering this price. Fortunately, there were supposedly several in the area, each having their own website and specific menu, but only the one in Schaumburg seemed to have the anniversary logo on their site, ensuring that the offer was valid there, so I suggested to the boys that we order from there.

The trouble was, we would need to wait until Logan was done with work before placing the order – and wouldn’t you know it, but the internet dropped just as he was about to wrap up his workday. This prevented us from ordering online, but also kept him from clocking out, so the two issues cancelled out. It wasn’t out long enough to be a real inconvenience, either, but once we logged back into the website, it refused to allow us into the online ordering section – presumably due to the traffic on the site, which should have been a red flag right there.

You see, the page listing the participating locations also had a few additional restrictions at the bottom of the page, including the fairly logical “one order per person per visit,” which meant each of us would have to order our own pie individually. No big deal there, apart from the difficulty we were having in trying to log on. The disclaimers continued, however, with something along the line that “individual locations reserve the right to discontinue this offer at any time without warning.” In short, they might decide that they’ve sold enough pies at $3.50 each (which, you’ll agree, is a heck of a loss leader) and just stop offering them for sale. So, we figured we would need to hurry.

After a few failed attempts to get back to the menu screen, we decided to call them and place our orders directly. Since Daniel’s order was the most complicated – he wanted to find out if they could put barbeque sauce on his; they had a specialty pizza that included it, but no clear way to add it through the website (which was a moot point, anyway) – he gave them a call, only to get a prerecorded message that the lines were busy, and to try again later.

This should have been another red flag, but at this point, we were too committed to the idea to back down just yet. This time, we decided to just go to the outlet and order our pizzas in person. So we bundled ourselves into the car and drove down there, a trip which probably took us some fifteen or twenty minutes. The lot in front of the place was packed, with cars coming and going; not only was it difficult to find a parking spot, it was more of a challenge than I’d expected just to move around toward it once we found one.

But eventually we found one and got ourselves into it, and we made our way to the door of the place… only to find a note taped to the door: “Promotion over; Not taking any further orders.” Bear in mind, this is at six in the evening; the dinner hour is just beginning. This is not what I’d expected to happen, even though their website gave every indication that this could be a possibility. As much as I’m not a fan of the place necessarily, we’d made all this effort to come here; it was still a disappointment.

Still, we made the best of it, driving over to another building in roughly the same parking lot, and getting dinner at a place that Daniel and I were more familiar with, albeit we’d only been to their original location in Des Plaines. It wasn’t the best option, perhaps – especially since, at current prices, it cost five or six times more than what we’d been expecting to pay (and since I hadn’t brought that much cash with me – I really need to pester Logan for his September rent payment – I had to put in on my credit card) – but the boys seemed fine with it. Logan, in particular, observed that it was nice to be out as the three of us, rather than just one or a pair of us – this was an unusual thing in any event, and he seemed to like it. And I guess that’s a good thing, no matter how you slice it.

Anyway, that was our night last night. You might have found it amusing to have been a part of; or not, as I know how you could get your heart set on a plan sometimes. I’ll keep you updated regarding further misadventures, but until then, keep an eye on us, and wish us luck. I’m sure we’re going to need it.