Dearest Rachel –
Some days – rather a lot of days, come to think of it – I have difficulty coming up with something to write you about, apart from the events of the day, which, unless I’m doing something extraordinary (such as during the last three months), aren’t generally the sort of things proverbially worth writing home about. I actually have one of those “unusual but ordinary” type of stories to tell you about, but it can wait, given the fact that today is Memorial Day, with some of the attendant odd thoughts that come to mind and, for whatever reason, I need to share with you.
Now, your father served – or at least enlisted – in WWII, although not having been killed, wounded or even actually deployed before the war ended (thanks to a bout of rheumatic fever, as I recall the story), I understand that this holiday is not for him. I don’t know if I knew it when I was growing up, but there’s that distinction between Memorial Day and Veterans Day; the latter is to honor the living, while the former is to honor the dead, and specifically, those who fell in the line of duty, serving their country by giving “the last full measure of their devotion,” as Abraham Lincoln put it.
And I mention Lincoln here because Memorial Day grew out of a custom of decorating graves of both Union and Confederate soldiers buried together on the battlefields where they fell, and treated equally as an act of both honor and reconciliation. Which, when you think about, it seems a very strange thing. Not so much the efforts toward reconciliation, as we wouldn’t be ‘one nation under God’ if we didn’t come to some form of reconciliation. But the idea of giving one’s life for one’s country gets me thinking… what if one’s country is wrong, especially when it decides to put lives on the line? This would be especially relevant for the Civil War, since both sides can’t be right, otherwise what is there to be fighting about?
Nations go to war all the time, for various reasons, but very rarely do they do so while believing they don’t have the upper hand in some way; either they are sure of victory, or they believe that God (Whoever That may be; obviously, nations don’t always agree on that, and in fact, this may be the very causus belli at hand) is on their side. The only exception, of course, is in a case where a nation is attacked, at which point, no matter how hopeless the odds are, they must fight, or be destroyed.
I mention all this because it’s more than a life that soldiers gives up for their country; it is also, to a certain extent, their immortal soul. The soldier, whether willing (if they’ve enlisted) or unwitting (if they’ve been conscripted), knows in the back of their mind that when they go into combat, there’s the possibility that they will be in eternity before the end of the day in a way that we civilians don’t and can’t appreciate (well, ‘understand’ would probably be a better word for it; the very existence for day like this should indicate that we do appreciate what they do and put themselves through). Do they know where they’re going? Are they concerned – or even aware – of the impact their actions might have on their imminent destination?
Now I’m not saying that the things soldiers do in the line of duty condemn them to perdition; after all, in a grace-based faith such as ours, what one does neither saves nor damns one. Besides, no such condemnation is given to soldiers of any rank in scripture – and that goes for the ‘hated’ Romans as well as the Jewish invaders of Cana’an as they returned from Egypt to reclaim the inheritance God had promised them. Paul, in particular, uses soldiers as an example of how we ought to live our Christian life, in fact; with a singular focus that again, civilians don’t tend toward. Even certain aspects of warfare, such as espionage, which tend to be a step grayer than the mere slaughter of battle, are given no worse than a neutral attitude – it’s all part of strategy and tactics. One does what one must in order to win; victory, after all, is the best way to ensure the fewest casualties on one’s own side, and often that requires resorting to any means necessary.
And yet, the willingness to do certain things – killing, of course, but also lying and other immoral acts, especially with regard to the business of espionage – that call into question one’s devotion. Did those who we’re supposed to be honoring today for their service – a noble sacrifice, to give up their lives for comrades, friends and a nation of people who will never know them – put their country before their immortal souls, because of the things they had to do in its service? When does such sacrifice become ultimate folly?
People sleep peacefully in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf
Attributed to George Orwell, first published by Richard Grenier in The Washington Times, 1993
I’m not denying that we, as a nation and society, are leagues better off for these rough men (and women), and the things they have been willing to do. So much of it is absolutely necessary at times – and during those times when it may not appear to be so, they still need to be ready to do these things, should the need arise, as it tends to quite suddenly. But there is the concern that some of them may have sacrificed themselves in more ways than just their physical lives.
He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not become a monster…when you gaze long into the abyss, the abyss also gazes into you.
Friedrich Nietzsche
How many of those we intend to honor today have been consigned to the abyss for eternity, in part for having embraced the monstrous things they felt they had to do? It isn’t even as if one could be excused for “just following orders”; that didn’t wash at Nuremburg, so why should it be expected to suffice before the Almighty?
Of course, it’s not as if I really have a right to say these things; I’ve never been in any sort of combat situation where lives are on the line, where it’s kill or be killed. And again, it’s not as if that’s condemned by God; indeed, in certain cases, He explicitly sanctions it. But we aren’t being told so obviously these days, as we are not led directly by His hands like the children of Israel were. All we can do it assume that God is with us; and we all know what can happen in such a case. It would be a nasty shock to think one is on the side of the angels, only to find oneself surrounded by only fallen ones upon falling oneself, and it would only get worse from there.
I do not mean to belittle the sacrifice of those who felt compelled to be rough for our sake; I am grateful for them. I just wish I knew if they had – and hope that they hadn’t – paid for our freedom and comfort, not just with their lives, but with their eternal destiny. That would be a price too great. And while you may know the answer where you are, it’s not as if you can relay it to us, and the secret to balancing morality amid the warfare that surrounds us.
For now, all I can do is to ask you to keep an eye on me – and those who may find themselves so honored by this time next year – and wish us all luck, as we’re going to need it.
Letters to Rachel 