Dearest Rachel –
I mentioned recently that we’re in the middle of a series on the Beatitudes at church. This past weekend’s topic was on hungering and thirsting for righteousness. It was pointed out that, just as in the real, physical world, there is healthy food, and there is junk food that we find ourselves consuming to attempt to assuage this hunger, and we need to be careful about what we consume. As I’m in the midst of this whole ‘weight-loss journey’ thing – and on Saturday night, also dealing with having to pick up dinner for Daniel and Logan, only to discover that the number of calories in a Little Caesar’s pizza (2,900 in a Meat Lover’s pie?) is utterly absurd – this is the sort of thing that grabs my attention these days in a way that it probably wouldn’t have in the past.
An illustration was brought up about how, not too long ago, the praise team would occasionally do a special number prior to a sermon using a secular pop or rock song that corresponded to the topic at hand. Apparently, certain people objected to the use of secular music in church; but when our lead pastor asked a particular complainant if they listened to the music in question in their car, they acknowledged that they not only did, but that they actually liked the song in question. “I just don’t think it belongs in church!” they insisted.
“But we are the church!” responded our pastor, referencing Paul’s argument that our bodies are the temples of God. Whatever we consume in terms of media is, in effect, being played ‘in church,’ because of who and what we are as part of His body on earth. If we would have a problem with certain pop culture we consume and activities we enjoy being exposed to the congregation, it just might be that we ought not to be consuming it ourselves in the first place. It sounds like a perfectly logical rule of thumb, although I’d have never considered it in so many words. And, I’ll be honest, it might suggest that certain things the two of us used to enjoy together might not have been particularly appropriate; we were pigging out on pop cultural ‘junk food,’ if you will.
But with that being said, I couldn’t help but ask about some of those activities that, while supposedly normal for us – and really, for any other couple – I certainly wouldn’t engage in them in church (or any other public setting, for that matter). I’m sure you know what I’m thinking of, honey – you know me too well (and, as I always used to say, I have a name to live up to – or down to, depending on your perspective). Did this rule of thumb apply here?
You used to be the one to take any questions that arose of a Sunday sermon directly to whoever was speaking; it was the only way to get answers, after all. I think it may be one of the reasons why, despite our expansion to multiple campuses, our church has always insisted on life teaching. There will always be questions about one point or another, and the sooner they’re addressed, the better off everyone is, both for the questioner’s sake (because they now have an answer) and the speaker’s (since he can address the question). So, I needed to ask Jordan about whether this activity fits under this rule of thumb, or if the analogy broke down at this point; it is, after all, considered a virtual duty within the context of marriage, but the idea of engaging in it in church borders on the sacrilegious.
Jordan, however, offered an interesting perspective; while we might not do something like that in church, the fact is that it’s a topic that can be discussion within those confines. Indeed, it’s something that needs to be discussed there, as it’s an integral part of a healthy marriage of any provenance, and therefore, an aspect that needs definition for a solid Christian marriage, as well. After all, there’s an entire book of the Bible dedicated to the principles; it isn’t exactly the Kama Sutra, but it does wax poetic on the subject, with a fair dose of advice (such as the admonition to not attempt to stir up certain emotions prematurely, which modern generations seem to have forgotten about). As evidence, he brought up Junior’s own marathon shirt, showing how we as Christian can talk about the subject without being (too) objectionable.
All of which made a reasonable amount of sense to me… and something to think about regarding certain items in my anime collection (none of which I’ve even so much as looked at since you left, I might point out… but, like you, I haven’t parted with, either).
***
Upon arriving home on Sunday, it crossed my mind that, while most people would refrain from public displays of affection, we weren’t always ‘most people.’ You would remember that B.A.S.I.C. would often make their way to a church in the Uptown neighborhood here in Chicago, and work there over the course of Spring Break. I did that at least once, mostly working in the soup kitchen and the like, during my college career. And while I don’t think you came up with us that year, you were up in the neighborhood during your senior year, and I came to visit you there (as best as I can remember, I was there to extract you at the end of the break, and bring you back home for a night before sending you on the Amtrak back down to Bloomington and your last few months at university).
The only reason I’m this certain of the timing is that we wouldn’t have behaved as we did prior to our engagement. But given that we were (and hadn’t seen each other in months), well, the results were predictable. I don’t know how we found an empty room in the place (well, I do – the place had numerous small rooms throughout it, not unlike either of our own home churches), but we were pretty much all over each other for an indeterminate period of time. As best I can remember (and you can take that for whatever you think it might be worth), it must have looked a bit like the beach scene in From Here to Eternity, except we kept our clothes on, and there was no beach (because… March, in Chicago).
At some point, however, someone walked in on us, and made it quite clear to the both of us that that sort of behavior was not appropriate in such a place, and we separated quite quickly thereafter, slightly embarrassed for having been caught out. But for that one extended moment, we were Adam and Eve, unashamed of ourselves or each other until we were told to be otherwise.
I’m told that this kind of affection doesn’t go on in heaven, and I don’t know how to feel about that. Presumably, it will not be missed, as it’s perfection made real. But on the other hand – and bear in mind, this is my own earthly opinion on the matter – I can’t imagine such a wonderful part of life on earth being absent from one’s perfect existence. It’s one more thing that I won’t understand until I get there, I suppose. For now, at least I have a few of those pleasant memories, as well as the assurance that the Lord doesn’t necessarily have the same objections as the member of ‘polite society’ that barged in on us had.
In any event, honey, keep an eye on me, and wish me luck; I’m going to need it.
Letters to Rachel 