The Satisfaction of Dreams

It’s often the little things in life that can be the most satisfying, particularly after a relatively long absence. For instance, after a week of irregular sleep, the fact that I woke up from a dream lets me know that I’ve finally gotten a good night’s sleep.

It wasn’t anything fancy, to be honest. The first scene barely involved me driving to my old office, getting to the gate and thinking about it for a moment, before backing away and driving home. As I was on my way home, my phone rang; it was Mohinder. I answered, as civilly as possible, “You realize, I don’t work for you anymore. You shouldn’t be expecting me to show up on any given day” (There was some indication that I’d been in the office the previous day, for whatever reason).

Anyway, the other scene had me at rehearsal for praise team – although I was in the main seats, rather than in the booth. Most of what I remember are snippets of the song (and I don’t even know if this is a real song or not, but it certainly sounded real, and familiar). The bridge involved the line “it’s not a storm… not a storm… ’til somebody tests you, tests you.” I don’t know whether my mind latched onto this for any particular significance or not; I’m just happy I was able to sleep well enough to dream.

Of course, the questionable aspect of whether a dream is satisfying or not is that, in order for it to be remembered, you have to wake up organically. And when you set your alarm as early as I have to on these trips that means getting up fairly early – or waking up with both too little time to go back to sleep, and too much to begin my morning routine. It sort of takes the bloom off the rose, to be honest.

Another issue about dreams is the question of your presence. While when I’m dreaming, I would much prefer to see you there, it makes things so much harder when I have to wake up, and go back to the present day. It’s almost worse when I realize I’m dreaming, and know even as I’m interacting with you, that a.) this isn’t real, and b.) you’re going to go away soon, either when I wake up, or am woken up. It’s more ‘lose-lose’ than ‘win-win’

Then again, I’m saying this from a perspective of not having seen you for a long time now, even in a dream, so maybe I’m just telling myself that to make myself feel better about that fact. I probably wouldn’t mind seeing you in my dreams sometime soon.

Although… maybe you should wait until I’m home from Israel, so I have all the time in the world to sleep in and be with you. Does that sound good to you? Because it sure does to me.

Anyway, I’ll talk to you soon. Got a lot to do today, after all, so you’ll hear about it before day’s end. Keep an eye on me, and wish me luck. I’ll probably need it.